Traveling Minds

She had it all but one thing was missing, yet she never addressed it
She met a guy who swept her off her feet then dropped her on her face
It took time but she got up and over it
She went off to school... Yeah a College girl experiencing life out there on her own
Just turned legal so she began to experience "The Party Life" in a city of finding yourself
She noticed the scene everywhere was the same, so that life became to a hault quickly
Besides spending dubs on the club seeing the same things and ppl is not worth it
Luckily she had a companion who agreed... Though having her ups and down with girlfriends
She quickly narrowed them down to three
The friends back at home remained, but she rarely reached out to them
That thing she never addressed had been reaching out to her though
Life began to get tough along her College journey when she and her father had a big dispute
I guess that's what death of a loved one tends to do to you
She had managed to deal with the death by doing something, that later had came back to bite her in the behind
Luckily again for her she had been blessed to get rid of it quickly and not receive something much worse
She thought this had been bad but never had a clue as to what had been in store... something much worse
That was only the beginning... Since her Dad left her astray things got worse by the day
Her oh so perfect life had been disappearing slowly people loved it for they had already began to assume she was just an act... That's when she got darted with knives in her back
The money stopped coming in, the communication was cut off, but thank God for her three friends and other family members they were her support, despite her downfall
Second year off College she had nothing but a car, little money to get back to school from home, and her plan
Her plan was put into action, yet the world seemed to beg the differ!
She lost all her material possessions her car, place to stay, and way of paying for classes
Then the bills came in and overwhelmed her... she didn't cry she stood strong and went around every obstacle thrown her way.
The money she anticipated for had never come through and she had no way of paying her bills
She began praying but she was only a conditional prayer
She could never understand why she would go through so much, but she never gave up and pushed for opportunity
Her prayers had been heard, because the doors starting opening, but not how she had planned!
In the mix of it all she met a boy, because he played the games of one
This boy had certain qualities that she had liked, yet he was not her type
He dressed nice had his own place and car, but her intuition said he's not the one
She ignored her intuition and did things her way
She had met a guy who had been a relative of the boy she was seeing and grew fond of him
She introduced him to a good companion and noticed that he was very genuine
She knew that he was a keeper so they became best- genuine friends
She talked with him more then his own relative and learned what a man should really be like through him
He was God fearing, attractive, goal-oriented, well- dressed, funny, and most inportantly genuine
She had admired his qualities and cherished their friendship
She would do anything he asked of her, because he would do the same
She had wished that the boy were more like him, but instead she settled for him
She had received all the signs that he was no good for her, but still she stayed
She was introduced to a church through a friend, and grew to like it so she joined
She met members who befriended her and shared their testimonies which made her want to change, so
She went to church every Sunday and wouldn't miss service for the world... that is until
She stayed overnight at the boys place one Saturday night
She had set an alarm for church, but dismissed it and turned over to look at the boy
She heard a voice say "Why didn't you go to church?"
She looked up to see that it was her bestfriend, she answered him "I don't know!" with shame
She then began to realize that she had made the biggest mistake by putting a boy before her God
She had told herself to leave the boy alone, but he would only plead with her to stay
She was naive for him, but not naive enough to stand under God's authority
She had been punished the more she stayed and knew she had to get out of her situation with the boy
She knew that fornication and salvation just did not mix, so she decided to change her ways
She had been punished with a flood that occurred more then once in the place she had stayed
She looked to the boy, but he ignored the situation, but Luckily the door for opportunity had been opened again
Her best friend had given her his room to stay in until the place where she stayed had been fixed
She had no money for food, but he had also provided that too, just as long as she set aside a plate for him
After realizing that God kept opening doors for her
She made it her New Years resolution to be committed to God and spent New Years eve in Church
She felt something come over her spirit and began to stretch her hands forth and cry out unto God
She made a declaration to never sin again nor settle for less, but to yield to God and follow what he has in store for her
She had been tested shortly after three days of her promise to God
She failed the test by letting temptation win over her salvation
She knew then that she would be punished,  but not how
She had left the boy alone for good this time and made a commitment to herself as well
She began to talk to her best friend one night about their plan v.s. God's plan
She mentioned that they should put their bad habits behind and follow through with God's plan
She had shared a story she heard in church that same day with him
She had no clue that what she had said had been a prophesy from God to warn her friend of his bad habit
She had received news the next day that her best friend had been hospitalized, but never knew how or why
She thought that he was in critical condition and that he had a minor injury from playing his favorite sport, but
She had no clue as to what had been in store for her eyes to see
She and her other good companion had gone to visit him and before she could enter the room and see him her good companion had burst into tears
She couldn't understand why until she had saw him lying in the hospital bed unresponsive
She had immediately stood strong and began to pray for him to herself
She then called up her Reverend and asked that they too be watchman on the wall
She knew that she had to stand strong for those around her, because their hearts had grown weary.
She had never let a tear come down her eyes she just remained hopeful... and for the first time in a very long time... She had prayed aloud over someone, that's when
She realized that it's only right that she change her ways
She had finally received the money that she had been waiting for and was faced with an ultimatum
She had to choose between helping to move her best friend (because the hospital had given up on his life) to another hospital or to get her room back
She decided that she would spare her life to save another and gave all of her money to her best friends' survival
She never mentioned why or thought about her living situation, instead she gave it all, and said that it was from her and her good companion both... her best friend had been moved and she waited up all night to hear good news of a safe arrival
She finally received the news and was somewhat relieved
She kept her focus on him and began to miss class some days, because it was overwhelming and her grades began to slip, and so did her high grade point average
She started going to church faithfully now not just Sunday, but Wednesday as well
She started to pray and fast and keep her focus on God for his health and got her good companion to join in
Though her good companion was not as persistent as she was she didn't allow her to get in the way
She would drive hours with her good companion to the hospital where he had been taken just to pray over him in person
She carried with her oil and placed it on the crown of his head, heart, hands, and soles of his feel for God's anointance and mercy over his soul
She wrote a letter to him over the course of him being hospitalized knowing that when he recovered it will be there for him to read and be aware of what was going on
Three weeks went by and while in a meeting she asked a question, but couldn't keep her focus
While her question had been answered she started to feel her body shake and her head twitch as if she had been fighting off a seizure
She then left the meeting and received a phone call... It was her best friends' sister calling, but she had already been on a phone call
She thought that she had been calling with good news until the calls were back to back; she then ended her call and returned her best friends' sisters' call
She heard a voice trembling and trying to speak... she asked, ''Whats wrong?''
She heard the words that her best friend had gone on his eternal vacation
She told his sister to keep praying over him, and that she was going to go to the church, call the Reverend, and pray that he becomes responsive again... then it began to rain
She grabbed her good companion asked her to drive and head to the sanctuary
She had asked why and she told her to just drive... she then said, "Please don't tell me it's what I think it is!"
She looked over at her and said that's why we have to pray... immediately she began to cry
She told her don't you cry we are going to pray for a miracle over his life
She then went to the church and the prayer warriors had heard the news and prayed for them in their time of grief
She said to herself NO I'm not giving up on him and began to find a spot to pray
She prayed and opened the bible to ask God for a sign
She then randomly opened the bible to the book of Mark 15:33
Then rays of sunshine was placed upon the bible after raining for hours
She knew in her heart that immediately he was going to be brought back to life
She went into the sanctuary and a good friend of the church shared her same story about her relative, the friend had told her that she too was like her, and was searching for a miracle and not to give up... but to keep in mind that he may have been standing in the gateway sparing his life for someone else's. The friend also told her to ask for prevention and not reaction.
She had kept that in my mind and it led her to thinking
She went home and while her good companion cried and screamed on the stairwell, she began praising God
She never slept and played their game of Uno, because she knew he was there in spirit
She often looked across the street where he lived and reminisced, then towards the sky shaking her head
She did not want it to be just old memories, but asked to dream of new ones to come
She never received a dream of him and could not understand why when everyone else did
She fought her minds thoughts of him being gone and fast and prayed; somewhere
Weeks went by and She finally accepted his decision to leave
She argued with everyone around her, because she had lost all hope in everything
She knew that she had reaped the consequences of what she had done before, and that this had been her punishment... It had hit her hard!
She began to blame herself for the death of her best friend, because God had warned her, as well as, him; They had both been punished and it was equivalent as to the hurt of the punishment
She knew that her own actions had been a hindrance to her blessings  
She wrote a letter to her best friend and a poem letting him know that she was happy with his decision, and that she supports him in all that he is doing
She had been asked to speak on his behalf as a friend at his funeral and was delighted to do so
She traveled back home with her companion and remained happy
She got herself prepped for his viewing, but as she walked in her heart began to race and she began to tremble with fear
She never went up to see him, but her good companion said it hadn't looked like him
She sat away from his casket and when it had been closed to go back into the hearse it had been reeled out near her
She then realized that he was gone and was not coming back; she stood up, stared, drew a blank, and reached out for him screaming his name and crying out for him to not leave her
She had been dragged out of the viewing and snapped back into reality
The next day she had awakened to a familiar song that she had heard her good companion play, and dedicate to her best friend while in the hospital
She rolled over from out of her sleep to see the video "Halo" by Beyonce on the tv
She could never understand again why he had reached out to her companions and not her
She then prepared herself for his funeral and let the words just flow as she spake on his behalf
She left the church while they allowed everyone to view his body, because she didn't want to face him
A week went by and it was Valentines Day
She had a dream that was very strange at first... She had been taken to jail and then released for fighting; then
She was walking by a big church window with Jesus's face in it, and a very bright light from the sun shining through it blindsided her
She looked towards it and had seen her best friend dressed in all white with a royal blue button up shirt and tie underneath
She had burst into tears and asked him a question... Are you always with us?
He had then answered her and said "I be busy ''She'' (like he had told her when he was at work or school) then he said, " I'm always here for you, and with you!" Then he disappeared
She then seen a girl dressed in all white in the sanctuary who had been suffering and was about to die, the girl was apart of a sorority (Alpha Kappa Alpha), then there were some AKAs dancing around (She) and asking her to join their sorority in a song
She knew that it's what her best friend wanted her to do, but she was still undecided about it
She was awakened by a knock on the door
She woke up and began to cry and write in her journal about her dream
She had shared it with her good companion, because she asked whats her reason for tears , but her friend never understood the dream
She had always hated Valentine's Day, but from here on out she loved it and decided to cherish it forever.
Months went by and She began to feel alone, her good companion had met a boy, and she began to see less of her
She had wished that her best friend were still there, but she had to sense his presence in spirit
She often played Uno by herself and got up the nerve to change her looks and start mingling more
She started to feel better once she started mingling and hanging with friends, but her life was still incomplete
She began crying more and asking God why is she in this stage of struggle
She had lost everything her best friend, transportation, place to stay, classes, communication, and laptop(in the flood)
She even was beginning to lose her good companion to a boy, let alone her mind
Her other bestfriend who she had lost over a dispute returned to her and she felt somewhat whole
She had tried to patch things up, but never got around to it, so she lived and let the friendship remain as is and not before
Her Bestfriend and good companion began spending more time together then they did and she remained to herself
No one knew of her struggles except her best friend in heaven, family, and good companion
She started to feel a sense of betrayal and had no one to turn to, but God
She then knew she was betrayed when her good companion had schemed her, but she remained silent
She then decided to Let Go and Let God, because he was still there through it all
She let him have his way and returned home
She had received a job and had enjoyed it
She got in touch with an old friend and started hanging with him
She started to see herself headed down the wrong path again and ended up back on the wrong path
She fought her temptation, but gave in
She then felt a pain she had never felt before; her heart had really ached and she knew this time that she had really let God down
She decided that is was not worth the agony and soon cut her friend off
She had been punished again with her job this time... her hours were cut short then she had non at all even though it was temporary!
She then started attending church back home and hanging with her best friends sister, but things were not the same, she would be reminded of him too much and cry her eyes out
She shared with his family the dream she had and she had been right about his attire they were stunned
She would also hang with her long term friend, but that too came at its end as usual, but she knew it was routine for them and that they would be friends again sooner if not later.
She still needed to find herself and her way
She was worried constantly about getting back into school and where life was going for her
Everyone was telling her what to do, but She had always kept in mind her best friends' advice on that and that was "Do what you want to, because it's your life and you have to live it, consequences and all!"
She had received a prophesy at a revival that had answered her worries and her spirit had been set free from bondage... that was to sign the application and don't be afraid to take that giant step, God had to disconnect her from somethings and get her where she needed to be, because that school she attented is not for her! He asked what was the school, she spoke of it and he said that God said "Sign the Application!" It's already there waiting for her... It's already been done!
She then decided to follow through with God's plan and not her own
She began to praise him more and not occasionally or conditionally and received her gift of vision back
She fought the doubt in her mind and became strong in faith for she knew her faith could move a mountain
She started going to a church and had been prophesied by a complete stranger; that as she was in the church praising God that she had been covered in all white... She was said to be elevated in God's word and presence, She was then asked if she was in school and she said No... but he said you want to go back, but you're held back financially; then he said that he sees her in a white coat like a doctor's coat and that she wants to go in the medical field, but it's those finances she's struggling with
She was stunned because it was all true, he told her don't worry about it because Grants are coming your way and so will the transportation
She thought wow God is real she believes his word... Then a women came to her and said that she too saw that "She" has been struggling and ''She" answered yes, then the women said, ''Your struggle is going to be eased!'' and "She" thought wow God is such an Awesome God!
She then started going back and received all sorts of prophesies that left her with nothing to do, but praise God... She was told she will lead in ministry, because the gift is inherited, that she will lead the people around her, that not just anyone can be her companion, that she will be an honor student and favored by the dean and her counselor, that she is the fruit in the basket which stands out, that she is different and curious about God and not to go head first into a church, because she was special and not any church can have her fellowship, that the last seat at the table is for her, and that she had suffered from something in the past that God had got rid of, and now wants her to save herself for marriage. It was all true!
She had once again fought the discouragement and struggled harder to prevail
She had spent one Sunday with her family and everything was going Great... UNTIL "She" had gotten into a dispute with her Mother... Early that day she received a fortune that said "If you put up with small annoyances then you will receive great gain." She just knew it wasn't for her, but it was!
She had put up with it and decided to go to her room and watch tv
She began to cry and starting thinking about her life
She then passed out and woke up to banging on the door, because she had locked it
She went out onto her balcony and sat against the wall balled up and crying
She was approached by her Mom who had said that it was time for her to pack her things and leave
She then went into the room turned over her nightstands and broke her closet door
Her family rushed in and asked her what was wrong, but she had gone mad
She was screaming aloud "I'm a failure, my life is a mess, and that she no longer wanted to live"
She went into detail about school and a job
She then backed into a corner and her soul stepped outside of her and watched as "she" was losing it
Her soul then overshadowed her and tried to comfort her, but there was no use
Her family then came to pray over her, but she was still out of the norm
She had been broken and battered, because the enemy had stolen her mind like he had been planning to
She then never slept because she kept hearing a voice saying "Pick up a knife and slit your wrist you have no reason for living your life is going nowhere, why not end it now?"
She knew it was the enemy and blocked him out by focusing on God
She was embarassed and was in fear of what would happen next, so
She did what she knew would cast out the enemy... She prayed and praised God
She let God intervene, because "She" knows that he supersedes all things
She then began going to prayer meetings and following through with God's plan... only this time
She sacrificed her friendships and her way of living for good
When the enemy tries to discourage her she turns open her bible to see what God says and puts her iTunes on shuffle and God never ever leads her astray he always leads her to what she needs to hear
She now listens to only gospel music and music with meaning
She is filled with joy and receives everlasting overflow
She now knows how to love
She has let go of what's no good for her and Let God handle it
She has grown closer to her family including her Dad and good friends
She is never negative about anything, but in all things optimistic
She is at peace
She has gotten accepted into the school her heart really desires with enough grants and finances to go to medical school as well
She knows that when it's time to return to school, that she will be on honors
She knows that God has a purpose for her life
She has decided to not make plans for herself, but follow the plans of God
She has a car that's paid off and it's the car she had been asking God for and not settling with
She has gained knowledge, wisdom, and understanding
She has an even better fully committed relationship with God
She loves to praise and worship God and speak of his Goodness and mercy
She does not care what others think of her praising God
She has gotten her standards back in order
She knows that her man Bryson awaits her in school
She is beautiful at heart and mind
She is Gods child and knows his protection is over her
She has finally decided to share her testimony... and
She is ME!